the metal of those hearts

Their base on Earth was strange and disjointed, but worked surprisingly well for all that. Half of the Harbinger ("the Halfbinger," Wheeljack had said meditatively, at the time, and Knock Out had laughed for the first time in -- well, a while, at least in Starscream's memory, and she too had warmed a little towards the Wrecker for it), the Jackhammer, the Iron Will, and a cavern system nearby that Starscream had walked them through shoring up, making safer and more comfortable. It wasn't necessary to travel far to get from one piece of their base to the other, and two parts were mobile, one very easily abandoned; the Harbinger would be a shame to have to abandon if it came to that, but still, their situation was very good.

Shockingly good. Starscream hadn't been pleased by the idea of having to come back to Earth at first, loathe to abandon Cybertron, but she was no fool. Ratchet, Knock Out, and Bumblebee had all argued for Earth, and their arguments had made... too much sense, really.

"Cybertron isn't what it was," Ratchet had said. "It may never be again... And that may not be a bad thing."

And that admission, new as it had seemed even to Ratchet, had startled her, but not as much as when Knock Out had said, flat-out, "Cybertron never did anything for any of us, did it? It was never good to us. The scraplets and the Predacons and Megatron can have it, and if the Council ever comes back they can choke on it. I don't see a single reason to stay."

In the end, about half of them had gone, and half of them had stayed behind. The Autobots (most of them) had proven a lot with their outreach to the Decepticons that remained, and Ultra Magnus's insistence on better treatment of the Vehicons. But Starscream hadn't been certain they'd be able to get along with any sort of long-term alliance, much less make for a very friendly 'team'.

She couldn't really say how they were doing on Cybertron. Arcee, Bulkhead, and Smokescreen had stayed behind to figure out a way to handle the new sparks coming out of the Well, and maybe make it more viable again to actually have new Cybertronians someday, so they didn't all go extinct. Shockwave volunteered to stay as well, agreeing that extinction was best avoided ("logically") and offering to finish work on a spacebridge to make travel between the two planets viable, but also privately stating to Starscream that they did not trust the Vehicons who wished to remain with the Autobots, and would take charge of them and look after their safety. Starscream had agreed, though in all honesty it was a shame to lose them, after she had gotten more used to them and comfortable around them.

But on Earth, well. Ten of the Vehicons had chosen to come with them, as had Soundwave. As had Knock Out, of course, and that wouldn't have been a surprise even if sie hadn't given that speech against Cybertron; sie'd always been obviously fond of Earth. Ultra Magnus, Wheeljack, and Bumblebee had an astonishingly lack of grudges, though Bumblebee seemed more nervous and blurted out some scrap, he seemed open to listening and thinking and learning. Starscream found herself getting along with them surprisingly well, and was glad to see Knock Out seeming friendly with them as well. And Ratchet...

Knock Out and Soundwave had gone along with Wheeljack on the Jackhammer, on their trip back to Earth, and Starscream had traveled with the Vehicons on the Iron Will, along with Ultra Magnus and Ratchet. She had been nervous, but resolute, and had slowly relaxed over the course of those two weeks, and had found herself sorely approving of Ultra Magnus's unflinching dedication to goodness and Ratchet's incisive mind and perhaps even more incisive commentary.

And she did not seem to be alone in that appreciation. Discussing their priorities once they got to Earth, Ratchet had shaken hir head after some of the plans that Starscream had laid out, and Starscream had had a moment of worry before sie'd said, "I'm beginning to see why Optimus kept me out of the field as much as he possibly could."

There had been what Starscream could only read as slight fondness in Ratchet's voice, and she had warmed to hir inadvisably almost immediately. "He could only isolate you for so long, doctor," she'd responded, and hardly had time to even worry (as she instinctively did, now, too often) that she had misstepped and might have offended Ratchet, speaking about Optimus in such a way, before sie agreed:

"Too long. But no longer."

Hir tone had been brisk enough, and even enough, that she had moved along back to their plans quickly, sensing pain there still over Optimus, but she had been amazed that Ratchet would so easily see and agree that Optimus had been isolating hir, despite fresh grief. She found herself seeking hir out more, engaging hir more -- even more than Ultra Magnus, who Starscream couldn't deny she was also warming to. But something about Ratchet's fierceness and truth-seeking drew her, and Ratchet seemed a bit baffled but -- she hoped -- pleased by that.

There were two small bedrooms on the Jackhammer, about the maximum there was room for and the minimum that was wise for a personal transport built to be able to carry four. There were three fairly small but certainly larger ones on the Iron Will, and about four official bedrooms on that part of the Harbinger, plus several rooms that could be fairly easily converted into bedrooms. Ultra Magnus volunteered that two of the rooms on the Iron Will should go to the Empress and her Second-in-Command, and Wheeljack said she was fine with whoever wanted to grab the spare room in her ship; Ratchet demurred that particular honor over to Bumblebee, and Starscream privately suspected, by this point, that it was because sie intended to use having a room on the Harbinger as an excuse to rarely use it and spend most of hir time in its labs instead. She knew a cyb who worked far too much when she saw one.

Sie wasn't going to get to forgo refueling, anyway. Knock Out pressed hir about it, gently, but that didn't do as much as Starscream merely offering to refuel with hir, and when she noticed that she started going out of her way to do so, at nearly every meal. Knock Out had prescribed mineral supplements in both of their energon, and Starscream knew she needed it, but Ratchet seemed to be too used to going without -- used to devaluing hirself into going without, and that was concerning, when she noticed it.

"It never actually seemed important for me to remember before," Ratchet admitted, wrapping hir hands around hir warm cube as Starscream took a sip from her own. "I'm not sure I'll ever be able to really feel hunger again. But I do appreciate the reminders. They're helpful."

"If enjoying your company can also encourage better habits, then I'm happy to be of help, Ratchet." Starscream had picked up on hir preferring scientific work to being a doctor, by then. She had also grown dangerously fond, and noted with a pleased amazement the way sie vented out hot, at that.

"Wh. Hmph. Well! You... certainly have been of help." That awkwardness out of the way, glancing away as she hid a smile behind her cube, Ratchet continued, "I've been thinking very much of-- what I believed before. How I acted. I only hope I can do better, Empress. Optimus was not good for me; not, I believe now, good for anyone."

Her hands, holding the energon cube, lowered, even as her wings went higher, amazed. "No," she agreed. "I-- I don't believe he was. With Optimus gone, and with Megatron at the very least missing in action," she'd much prefer his being dead, his presence in the universe still made her incredibly nervous, but this would work for now, "peace finally seems to be possible... What is happening now, it would never have happened with either of them." She looked, gestured, around, as if to indicate everything, and Ratchet nodded once, weary.

"No, it would not," sie agreed. "And this-- isn't to absolve myself, or take the easy way out. Whatever my reasons, I owe you an apology for the way I treated you before. Whatever happens from now on, I will never do so again."

"Ratchet." She reached out, touched one of hir hands that was holding hir cube, impulsively, and when sie blinked she pulled back again a bit embarrassed. "I, er. I forgive you. I do appreciate your apology, but things were difficult for us all. And, as you've said... we can do better now. Let our relationship moving forward be the proof."

"Generous of you, Empress," Ratchet noted, looking at her oddly, as if trying to puzzle something out.

She vented out hot through her cheekvents. "You-- needn't always call me by my title. As much as I appreciate your respect."

"Starscream, then." Ratchet raised hir cube to drink, adding, "You should finish your energon. It's getting late, and I know someone inclined to overwork when I see one."

Starscream was surprised into a short laugh, at how Ratchet unexpectedly echoed her own thoughts about hir, and was amazed by how bright her spark felt when she saw hir smile behind hir energon. "Then we both know from experience," she teased, smirking at hir, pleased with the easy banter -- which, after Knock Out and, more recently, Wheeljack, she was starting to associate with comfort and friendliness rather than disrespect. "You will be staying up late in the Harbinger's labs tonight, I'm sure?"

Ratchet's smile faltered in astonishment, and she worried for a moment, yet again, that she'd overstepped her bounds. But the worry didn't come as strongly this time, reassured after lack of negative reactions from Ratchet thus far, and by the way hir eyes brightened up sie didn't seem upset. Though sie did have the good grace to seem a bit embarrassed. "Possibly not," sie allowed. "How did you...?"

"You seemed excited to hear that it was a science vessel, and you were very quick to accept a room there, rather than on Wheeljack's ship. How often do you actually spend in that room?"

Ratchet snorted. "Not as often as I should. But sleep is yet another luxury I'm used to forgoing."

Starscream softened. "Neither sleep nor energon should be luxuries, Ratchet. And they needn't be, for us. Not anymore."

"...You've been through more than most of us, haven't you?" Ratchet shook hir head. "Well. Thank you for concerning yourself for an old washed-up medic."

"I was constructed in 217," Starscream said dryly. And she was pretty sure that was at least a century earlier than Ratchet's construction, so, "Neither of us are old or washed-up yet. And I am -- I hope -- concerning myself for... a friend?"

She trailed off a bit there, suddenly uncertain, not worried in the way she had been before but not sure if she was perhaps the only one thinking of Ratchet as an actual friend, rather than an ally, a friendly acquaintance perhaps. But she couldn't regret saying it when Ratchet smiled at her again, this time a bit wondering.

"I would like to be your friend, Starscream," Ratchet confessed, and then sie was the one to hesitate, noticeably so. She gave hir a quizzical look, inviting hir to go on, and drank a bit more of her energon as she gave hir time, and nearly started coughing when sie did continue, "--Possibly more. If you were interested."

She swallowed successfully, then pulled in an amazed breath, lowering her energon cube. Her eyes were wide, but delight was swiftly growing in her, and a smile played at her own lips, tugging at them with an earnest softness. "That. Would be very nice," she admitted, and Ratchet grinned a very fetching grin.

"Then we should both finish our energon," sie suggested. "If nothing else, I would like to spend a bit more of my free time with you."

"If you'd like," Starscream offered, emboldened, "we could finish refueling in my quarters. I wouldn't want to disturb Ultra Magnus overmuch, but..." she smirked, again, warm and promising this time, "as with energon, perhaps I could encourage you into better sleeping habits, hmm?"

Ratchet was blushing up a storm by then, but taking in the look on her face with obvious delight. "That is the best idea I've heard in a long time."